A book with no pictures

I have been putting together a scrapbook the last day of things that we have drawn and written about Daryn.

Kaila was in her room working on something when she brought me a paper.
On the top she spelled Daryn in letter stickers and wrote:

DARYN

care
pray
think
Love
picsher mind
picsher

So of course I have to ask, what does "picsher mind" mean?
She responded, "It means, like when you read a book with no pictures, you can still picture her in your mind."

Which makes me think, yes Daryn is our "book with no pictures', she is in our hearts, we LOVE her, we CARE for her, we PRAY for her, we think about her we can picture her in our mind and we can look at pictures of her. All of these things, but physically she is missing from our lives.

So this list she made was the ways we can still stay connected to Daryn, even though, physically she is not with us. When we see her again, there will still be the connection. She will still be my niece, she will still be Kaila's cousin, connected through the family chain!!

I still have moments that I sit and think, I can not believe this has happened. I can't believe she is gone. I think sometimes we get busy with everyday life and then all of a sudden it hits you! It is probably hard for others to understand, but I just can't seem to wrap my mind around the fact that she is gone.

I asked Kaila what do you remember about Daryn? She said, she remembered Daryn painting her face (which the big kids did on the little kids faces for a Christmas party, they did that at Daryn's home, in her bedroom). I was happy Kaila remembered that because that is a memory that there are no pictures of. It is something she will always keep in her mind, probably because it was one of the rare times that the kids were actually sitting still. With the 12 kids, there usually wasn't much still time, they ran around, laughing, screaming and having a ball!
To have her that close in proximity to Daryn I believe helps her to remember the little details of that moment.

I often remember her standing near me the August, before, poolside, and picture her tan little body, her hands and her feet, her blonde locks of hair, blue eyes, she was a stunning looking girl! Beyond that she was stunning on the inside too, she really was. I am not saying she was perfect, because not one of us are, but she just seemed to know how to behave, how to make others feel special and how to use herself in a way that would make her parents proud of her......... and boy were they proud, but in a very humble way. Joe wouldn't brag about Daryn, but if the subject came up, I can remember him talking about her taking recorder lessons she was learning Star Wars music (of course Joe thought that was cool!). Then there was the baseball games, she was a natural in the athletic dept., Joe especially thought this was cool. His beautiful little daughter had a bit of a Tomboy side to her. She wasn't afraid to get muddy/dirty. Then there was her artistic side that was blooming, both Kim and Joe great artists, and she definitely was taking on that talent as well.

I can't imagine the loss Joe, Kim, Colin and Jolee feel on a constant basis in their lives. It is just really hard to think about and imagine!

I pray today that Daryn is showered with Love from her family. That her great grandparents that are with her right now will just BE with her until her parents arrive. I pray for her family here, that they are also showered with love from God and that they are renewed each day with a sense of HOPE that will get them through another day!

Love you Daryn!!
aunt mindy